My mom’s favorite story of me is when I was very young. I would go into the kitchen, take all of the pots and pans out of the cupboard, climb inside and sit there. I would be there for hours, by myself, in the dark, just chilling out. Every once in a while, she would open the door and ask me if I was ok. I would nod, and she would close the door. As I have grown, I haven’t changed that much. No, I don’t climb into dark cabinets, but I do enjoy my “by myself” time. For me, it’s not really “alone” time, because I do best in that space when I have access to people. If no one is around, the loneliness can become very big and unbearable
I’m kinda weird (ok, very weird), in that I get my energy by being inside myself, but I do it best when I am with people. My sermon prep is usually done, not in a quiet lonely place, but in cafes, coffee shops, almost anywhere that people gather. I love people, and love being around them, even if we are not actually dealing with each other. I think I was able to stay in the cupboard so long because I knew my mom was right there, and would give me the right amount of interaction. Connecting with people, even distant connections, allows me to be “alone” without being lonely… weird, but true…
This year, I think I have been more intentional about being with people. Reconnecting with old friends, and finding new ones. In the process, what is interesting for me, is that I have found that I want to meet more people… this is new for me, but it has proven to be wonderful. The new friends I have made have expanded my knowledge, my emotional capacity, my concept and understanding of the world. Interacting with people is like a fine meal – it satisfies you and makes you want more.
One of the most exciting parts of meeting new people is being invited to be a part of their life. It’s one thing to know who they are from the outside, quite another to hang out with them, have a meal with them, or participate in something that is very near and dear to them. It is creating a masterpiece together, putting each other’s uniqueness into the project, making it something more than you ever imagined. My friend Vic and I get together every now and then, and get a hangar steak dinner at The Tied House. As much as either of us enjoy the meal, we enjoy even more seeing the expression on each other’s face when we take the first bite, and the conversation the ensues from our enjoyment of the meal. Vic started talking to me about a venture he is looking into, and invited me to consider being a part. That blessed and jazzed me to no end, not so much because of the venture, but because it was something I could do with my friend.
I have also been talking to Estrella about guest posting on each other’s site. There is something very intimate about writers sharing their pad. I have had the privilege of guest posting on Fear of Writing a couple times, thanks to my friend and writing coach (in that order) J. Each time I have met someone new, and received good feedback on my submissions (writers can be so cool 🙂 ). I’m in the process of putting together my post for Estrella’s site, and can’t’ wait to see how it will blend with the wonderful items she already has. The invitation to participate in Estrella’s site has given me inspiration to go to my alone place and not be lonely.
Ok, I couldn’t resist… because I love the song, and some of y’all will remember the fashions:
Estrella Azul’s site, “Life’s A Stage” http://estrella05azul.wordpress.com/
J Clement Wall on “ZebraSounds” http://zebrasounds.net/
Milli Thornton’s “Fear of Writing blog” http://fearofwriting.com/blog